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| "Sun Dog," photo by Bill Slavin |
Do you have a life-affirming idea that you return to when you need to make a difficult decision? Do you rely on the Golden Rule? Or are you propelled by anger? Do you ask the question, "What if everyone did that?" Or do you hope to leave this world a better place?
The New York Times asked its readers about their personal philosophy of life. The answers have been published each Sunday in April. When I read through the thoughtful and positive responses, I thought of my own guiding principles and wondered if the pandemic had affected my answer. I have always liked the solemn, slow pace of the older version of the Golden Rule, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you," combined with the idea that "What goes around, comes around." Both ideas give me a foundation to build my life around.
One writer mentioned the Golden Rule but preferred the Platinum Rule as a guide. Instead of assuming that everyone wants to be treated the same, the Platinum Rule asked, "How would that person like to be treated?" In the last year, this rule seems more important as we realize more and more that everyone's life has not been the same and our own desires may not be the norm.
Anger, another answer, surprised me, but the writer suggested that many of her positive actions resulted from her anger at a particular issue. Anger was what got her going. I realized that anger had driven me to participate more fully in political issues this past year than I had ever done before.
Another reader asked of "What if everyone did that?" I thought immediately of the last five years and the constant chaos that rained down on us from the previous administration. We continue to see imitators not only in the public scene, but in our neighborhoods, who have been emboldened to be rude, caustic, and selfish. Those people have made a choice to be self-centered. What if they did the opposite and thought first of other people and decided they wished they had been more kind? They would live up to the code to leave the world a better place.
The pandemic year has shone a light on what we value, what we hold most dear. After reading the letters in the NY Times, I realized I have added anger to my list of codes this year and changed my viewpoint from the Golden Rule to the Platinum Rule.
Have you made a change in your guiding principle(s) of life?
You can read the responses in the New York Times re personal philosophy:
https://www.nytimes.com/2021/04/10/opinion/letters/personal-philosophy.html?searchResultPosition=20
https://www.nytimes.com/2021/04/17/opinion/letters/personal-philosophy.html?searchResultPosition=11
Wonder what the next generation is thinking? Take a look at these blogs by 4 bloggers, students of Chandra Lyn, a college instructor and fellow blogger:
https://iamchandralynn.com/category/focus-on-black/
Wanea A.: https://unbecoming247.wordpress.com/2021/04/16/no-man-is-a-paradise-island-soul-work/
Na'veh: https://thebloggingsofv.wordpress.com
From Mary by email: I spent my morning following your links to the letters written to the editor of the NY times. It was such a good exercise to be help me put into perspective what is really important in my life. Thank you for sending me in such a positive direction today.
ReplyDeleteI am so glad that you spent time with those letters-to-the-editor. They are enlightening.
DeleteIt's so inspiring to discover the creativity and wisdom of the young bloggers. Thanks for posting, Martha!
ReplyDeleteyes, I agree. We need to hear what young people have to say. There will be more next week.
DeleteFrom Hugh on FB: Great essay, Martha . Got me thinking about rules I live by. Thanks. Smiling.
ReplyDeleteI’ve achieved one of the rules,
“Be the person your dog thinks you are”:
He keeps reminding me that I’m his handmaiden.
He believes I’m a rival for Ginny’s attention.
And a necessary (evil?) 3rd wheel to make a cozy family on the couch.
And a bumbler that he needs to keep commenting on (he does he does!) (“Gin, he’s so manipulative”, when she gets up to heat my coffee for the 2nd or 3rd time, e.g.)
It’s wonderful.
Only Hugh could write this. Thank you for reading my post, Hugh, and for taking it to heart.
DeleteFrom Michelle by email: Your Words to Live By piece is so thought provoking. So true that the pandemic has been mind bending in so many ways and we have all been reshaped. I also love your combo of guidelines, such a strong moral compass.
ReplyDeleteI discovered guidelines years ago in the prayer of St. Francis of Assisi which helps me search for the opposite reaction of what I initially feel or see.
The trick is trying to bear it in mind when I’m say, hurt or angry. I have a mobius strip bracelet with these words engraved on it, and that helps. I’m sure you know it:
Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace,
where there is hatred, let me sow love
where there is injury, pardon
where there is error, truth
where there is discord, harmony
where there is doubt, faith
where there is despair, hope
where there is darkness, light
and where there is sorrow, joy.
Basically it means turning everything on it’s ear! But it feels so right when I can apply it!
This is such a calming and purposeful prayer. Thank you for sending this, Michelle.
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